Sometimes I feel a sadness that my parenting days are over. I am the mother of 2 not-so-young adult sons. They have now been out on their own for well over 2 years. I must confess that I miss them. It took them a long time to take the plunge to move as the cost of finding their own place was high. It is much easier to live with Mom where there is plentiful food, cable TV, and free laundry.
When they first moved out of our home, they were coming over all the time. It’s convenient that they both live a couple of miles away. I would look forward to our family dinners and the time we spent playing the card version of Monopoly.
Over time, our routine has changed. Lately, I find myself texting them invites for dinner only to find that they are busy. Both boys have a myriad of friends and interests.
Yesterday, my youngest stopped by for a quick visit. He shared his adventures with his new girlfriend and how is new job promotion was going. He had the next few months all planned with a trip to Canada and new adventures with his girlfriend. He even shared with me that he and his brother have planned a trip to Europe for the fall.
All of this news and excitement caused me to pause. Did I not want my children to grow up to be self-sufficient? Did I not want them to find good friends and hopefully a life partner?
A small part of me wished for the days when my children looked to me to make the decisions and to plan the trips. The biggest part of me was grateful that I have children who have grown up to be healthy, independent and generous human beings.
I am happy to take on my new role with my sons. I love their stories and am willing to recognize that they need me in a new and different way.